Category Archives: female friends

September 1, 2015 · 10:38 am

Reflecting…

Yesterday was the 18th anniversary of the shocking death of Princess Diana. It’s so hard to believe it’s been that many years.

princessdi

In 1997 I was 37, my daughter was 8.  When the news broke, I’ll admit it, I lost it. Completely. I came apart so emotionally that day, I scared my daughter. She’d never had someone die in her life up to that time and was unprepared for how I took it, how it effected a person.

There’s a lot about that day, and the next week until her burial, that I’ll never forget. I sat glued to my living room chair, watching the news 24/7. It was the lead story everywhere, every station, every channel whether it was cable or broadcast tv. What I remember most was the shock, the jaw dropping shock, the looks of utter befuddlement, that crossed anyone and everyone who was interviewed. No one could have predicted the loss of such an amazing, vital, beautiful person  at such a young age from such a stupid event as a drunken driver.

One of the news broadcasters asked if we’d be as shocked and horrified as a people if she’d died from an illness, or been assassinated by a terrorist group. Why was it her death at the hands of someone not in control that was so hard to believe? The amount of grief running through the world from her death was incalculable. I thought it was a stupid question at the time and still do. We’d have been shocked at any way in which she’d be taken from us.

Diana was one year younger than I was. I, like one hundred million people worldwide, watched her get married. I celebrated the true romantic fairytale-come-to-life that we were led to believe was real. I celebrated the birth of her sons with her, and then mourned the death of her marriage, because a fairy tale doesn’t really end at “they lived happily ever after.”

Diana was my age-peer, but we had so much more in common than just our chronological age. We both suffered from very public eating disorders, exacerbated by stress and loneliness; both felt the ravishes of being from divorced parents; both wanted to  be people pleasers so we’d know our value in the world. Sure, she married a prince and I married an ophthalmologist, but even though she was considered a Royal, the world – myself included – considered her one of us. No other Royal to date has been able to garnish the love from the common man that Diana did.

A short week later, on September 5, 1997, Mother Teresa died and I remember my daughter asked me why two such beloved women had to die at the same time. I had no wisdom for her, only what my heart told me: God must have needed them in Heaven really badly for him to take them both from us.

The world has changed dramatically  since August 31, 1997. For a very brief time we were given the gift of having Diana in it. All she ever wanted was to be the Queen of People’s Hearts. It’s too bad she had to leave us before she knew she was…..

diana-princess-of-wales

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August 24, 2015 · 10:52 am

10 things I believe

Today’s blog is a little different because I’m not talking about writing ( for once!)

These are the top 10 things I believe with all my heart:

1. Good will always triumph over evil. ALWAYS

2.People are basically good; circumstances change them.

3.  If you eat fish for dinner and don’t empty the garbage right away your house will smell like stale, old…you got it!

4. Girlfriends are like fine bottles of Port(my favorite!)…they only get better with age.

5. If a woman says “fine,” when asked if something is wrong…run.

6.  If you have a choice to work for overtime pay or spend the day with your kid…ditch the OT. You can’t buy a memory      with overtime pay.

7.   Children are like flowers…they need food, attention, nurturing and most of all daily doses of love and affection to grow to be beautiful.

8.   Superman wins over Batman EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. DO not argue with me about this…you will lose.

9.   Bottle blondes have as much fun as natural blondes.

10. Laughter can cure just about anything; love certainly can.

 

Any thoughts? Let’s discuss…

 

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August 21, 2015 · 9:21 am

A visit with Linda O’Connor

Today I’m hosting fellow contemporary romance author Linda O’Connor. We recently found out we were inches away from one another at RWA in NYC last month, both of us working at the Literacy Signing for the Nora Roberts Foundation. After interviewing her, I realize we share a lot more than just that chance encounter! Here’s Linda:

Linda O'Connor author

Thanks so much for having me on your blog, Peggy! It’s my pleasure. Now…

What drives you to write? I have a story to tell, lessons to teach, places to be, people to meet. . . wait what was the question?

What genre(s) of Romance do your write, and why? I write contemporary romance stories with humor– I like when the heroines are strong characters. Maybe their life would be better with the hero, but they do okay on their own, too.

What genre(s) of Romance do you read, and why? I read contemporary romance with humor or anything that Nora Roberts/JD Robb writes. I usually read for relaxation so I’d rather not read something sad.

What’s your writing schedule? Do you write everyday? I set aside two days a week to write without interruption (and if I can get away with not making dinner those days, even better). I’m a physician and work part-time at an Urgent Care Clinic, but any other time I can sit down and write, I do.

Give us a glimpse of the surroundings where you write. Separate room? In the kitchen? At the dining room table? We live on the water so I like to sit so I can see (and hear) it. Outside or in our living room with my laptop both work.

Are you the kind of writer who needs total quiet to compose, or are you able to filter out the typical sounds of the day and use your tunnelvision? I prefer silence. It’s hard to filter out questions about the laundry, dishes, lost articles… usually the interruptions come right when I’ve thought of the perfect line.

Do you listen to music while you write, and if so, what kind? If not, why not? No, I prefer quiet.

How did you come up with the plotline/idea for your current WIP? I’m a genius.

Which comes first for you – character or plot? And why? I have an idea for the beginning, middle, and end of the story and then develop the characters.

What 3 words describes you, the writer? I’m still learning.

Now for the personal, nosy stuff!

  1. Tell us one unusual thing about yourself – not related to writing. I don’t drink coffee.
  2. Who was your first love and what age were you? I married my first love! We met at the hospital when I was a 4th year medical student and he was a third year ophthalmology resident. I think he liked my eyes.
  3. If you could relive one day, which one would it be? Think GROUNDHOG DAY, the movie for this one – you’ll have to live it over and over and…. Oh that’s a hard one… well actually last Thursday was pretty fun.
  4. Do you like a guy in boxers, briefs, or commando? Gee, commando would mean less laundry.
  5. If you had to give up one necessary-can’t-live-without-it beauty item, what would it be? Sunscreen.
  6. What three words describe you, the person? I love leftovers.
  7. If you could sing a song with Jimmy Fallon, what would it be? You lost me at “If you could sing”.
  8. If you could hang out with any literary character from any book penned at any time line, who would it be, why, and what would you do together? I’d hang out with Eve and Roarke in 2060. Driving a flying car would be a blast, and I’d like to try out that healing wand they have.

Bonus round

I love the Actor’s Studio show on Bravo, so this is my version of it:

  1. Favorite sound – my husband’s voice (especially when he says “I’ll make dinner.”)
  2. Least favorite sound – wind chimes
  3. Best song ever written – Be Real by The Jaded Gentlemen
  4. Worst song ever written – I don’t think there is a worst song ever written. Even if I’m not fond of a song, there’s probably another audience who enjoys it.
  5. Favorite actor and actress – Mark Kratky, Chilina Kennedy
  6. Who would you want to be for 1 day and why? ( It can be anyone living or dead) I actually like being me.
  7. What turns you on? Humor
  8. What turns you off? Prejudice
  9. Give me the worst 5 words ever heard on a first date ( here’s mine: “Is that your real hair?”) It’s been a while since I had a first date, but I only have memories of charming men and a lovely time. Now, if you’d asked about the second date . . .
  10. What’s your version of a perfect day? Writing from 8am – 3pm, bicycle ride, swim, someone else making dinner.

And here’s the fun stuff:

Perfectly Reasonable

 

 

PerfectlyReasonable (600)_edited-3 (1)

Love what you do and do what you love. Sounds perfectly reasonable, but chances are, you’ll find your passion in the last place you look . . .

Margo MacMillan finished medical school, but in the process, her self-confidence and self-esteem took a beating. So for the sake of self-preservation, she’s stepped away from medicine to re-group. In the meantime, painting soothes her soul and pays the bills.

Trace Bennett set his sights on a medical degree and has to prepare the perfect medical school application. His big plan is to paint his condo for a little feng shui divine luck. When Margo shows up to paint, he realizes he’s found exactly what he’s looking for. He just has to convince Margo to share more than the art of medicine.

She’s got it. He wants it. It’s Perfectly Reasonable.

Biography:

I’ve been writing romance novels for four years and sincerely thank Debby Gilbert at Soul Mate Publishing for the ultimate encouragement to my writing – with the leap to publishing. I have many titles including Doctor, Mom, and proud Canadian, but “Linda O’Connor – hereinafter called the Author” on the SMP contract was one of the sweetest.

Contemporary romantic comedies are my favourite novels to read and write. I balance writing with my work as a physician at an Urgent Care Clinic and being a mom to three sons (luckily grown and capable of throwing together a decent meal, in a pinch). I like to keep active and cycle, cross-country ski, skate, walk with my husband, or dance every day.

Laugh every day. Love every minute.

I love connecting with readers.

Book Trailer: 

Website: 

amazon author page: 

Goodreads author page

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/LindaOConnorAuthor

Twitter: @lindaoconnor98

 

Thanks for hosting me, Peggy! Listen Girl, this has been an absolute delight! I swear, we’re dopplegangers, only you’re the smart, pretty one!

 

 

 

 

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April 4, 2015 · 12:08 am

The Power of Friends

I don’t have many friends, but the ones I do have are keepers for life.

Oh, I have friends on Facebook, and followers on Twitter and Pinterest. People, even follow this blog ( thanks so much for doing so!) But real honest to goodness, give you a kidney if you needed it friends are few and far between.

But that’s okay. Like I said, the one’s I have are keepers.

As an only child, I grew up mostly alone. Parents at work all day and into the evening, I spent a great deal of time at the local library after school. The head librarian knew more about me than my family did. Books became my true friends. Trixie Beldon, Nancy Drew, even Miss Marple where the people I shared my life with. It sounds sad, but it wasn’t. I loved being in the library surrounded by words. It was so much better than being in school surrounded by bullies who taunted and tortured me verbally because I looked different, was different, had a different last name than my mother ( this was the 60′ and 70’s – not too many divorces yet among the populous). Books were my friends, their characters my peers and teachers.

Okay, so maybe it was a little sad, but believe me, I never felt like it was.

When I got older and my outer shell of protection hardened, it was easier. I was still different than most, but I started to discover people who were similar in their  own differences to me. Book readers; smart kids; creative kids. Kids who didn’t care what people thought about them. Kids who would stand up for me, and me for them, against the bullies and clique’y kids. All the knowledge I’d gleaned from those books I’d been surrounded with helped me discover the person I truly was. The kid on the inside who lived on the outside and wanted nothing else but to belong.

In a word, me.

No longer did I wait until people sought me out – I started pursuing them. I started actually making friends, putting myself out there and trusting that I wouldn’t get hurt. And if I did, well, then, I’d chalk it up to life experience.

I’m still that same kid on the inside. Still know I’m different from most, think differently than the norm. But the people who are close to me now, the ones who truly are friends in every sense of the word, are the ones who are most precious to me.  They share my highs and my lows, give me strength and receive it from me when they need it, and they celebrate the person I am, differences and all.

It’s been said that words have power. My power comes from within, but also from my friends. And they make me feel very powerful indeed.

 

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March 29, 2015 · 3:29 pm

Why we should support each other as Writers….

One of my lovely, talented and fun-to-be-around NHRWA member chapter-mates just found out she is a finalist in the RWA GoldenHeart Contest. For those of you who don’t know what this means, listen up. The Golden Hearts awards are given to extremely talented and deserving romance writers who have not had a book-length romance published as of yet. It’s like the Golden Globes awards are to the Oscars. In romance, the Oscars are the annual RITA awards. So when my chapter-mate’s name was announced the other day, everyone who knows her was instantly thrilled for her, including all of us who belong to the New Hampshire chapter. Prestige, honor and open doors in the publishing world all accompany this nomination and, subsequent win. She – and we – will find out the winners at the annual RWA conference in July in NYC. It proves to be a truly memorable event.

Her nomination/finalist state and our happiness for her got me to thinking. Writers of romance are truly the most convivial and supportive group of humans I have ever met. We applaud each other’s successes, understand the emotional toils  the non-successes ( I don’t like the word failure) take on our souls, and we cheer each other on through the often grueling process of creating love on the page.

Romance writers are a rare breed. And I am so thankful they/we are.

Competition many times fosters a sense of isolation and removal from the group of people you are competing against. The goal is to win it all, many times at whatever cost. Friendships are lost and destroyed all just to grab that proverbial golden ring.

Not so with romance writers. Yes, we compete against one another in the basic sense because we all want to get our book published and into the hands of readers. But for every NYT bestseller and USA list out there where a romance writer makes it to the top, the rest of us know we can make it there, too. The trail blazers like Nora Roberts, Beatrice Small, and Kathleen Woodiwiss have made what we write relevant to the masses and  a force to be reckoned with in the sales division. We literally stand on their writing shoulders and are lifted up by their triumphs to gain success for ourselves. The better they do, the better we do.

So. I congratulate my writing friend with all sincerity and love. She is truly deserving of the nomination AND the win. When we are all in NYC in July I will be among the other 2,000 or so attendees who will be standing and applauding her victory, for her victory is also ours and we are better for knowing her.

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November 24, 2014 · 6:42 pm

Fan girl crush

Is it weird to admit – at my age – I have a fan-girl crush?

Not the wacko stalker kind. But the kind of crush that makes you smile without knowing you’re doing it or the reason why you are?

Okay, so here’s my confession, then. My fan-girl crush is on Nora Roberts.

Yeah, THAT Nora Roberts. Author of about a gazillion books, all of them wonderful. Creator of the “In Death” series, which features two of the best characters ever put to the page: Eve Dallas and * sigh * Roarke. Master plotter, publishing wunderkind, and one of the most proliferate authors on the planet.

I had the absolute pleasure to meet her, shake her hand, get an autograph and listen to her give a master lecture this past summer at RWA 2014. I think I smiled the entire time. Well, not when I cried when I met her, though. But even through the tears, I was smiling with glee!

I’ve read every book she’d ever had published, some of them two or three times. Why? Because she is – to me – the penultimate master in romance writing. The way she can convey an emotion, a look, a thought, is pure writing genius.

She is a completely humble woman, as well, and she gets a million kudos for that. She could be the most conceited, arrogant writer you will ever meet. But she is not. She is warm, open, damn funny, sarcastically spot-on and just a delight to listen to with her smoker’s gravel voice, and her characteristic way of turning a phrase.

If you ever have the opportunity to attend a lecture she is giving – GO! As a writer you will learn more than you ever thought to, be inspired like you never dreamed you would, and be entertained thoroughly.

Yes, I am a 54 year old wife-mother-nurse-writer and I have a fan-girl crush. Deal with it.

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November 18, 2014 · 12:46 pm

When is too much personal info, well, too much?

I read an interesting writers blog the other day which questioned how much of ourselves we should and should not put out there on social media sites. Here’s the link: http://www.brendamoguez.com/manic-modays/how-much-is-too-much-to-confess/

I’ve questioned myself numerous times over the past 10 months since I decided to make this writing career the next chapter in my life. In order to have a solid career in writing you need a following; a fan base; readers. Although I’m well-known in my town, I need more than the local peeps to build this base, so I’ve entered the social media realm.

I started with a website, then branched over to Facebook and Twitter. I’m LinkedIn and tumble on Tumblr. I pin on Pinterest and Googleplus myself into a frenzy. Keeping up with all these sites is a lot of work, and it got me to thinking: When is publicly divulging too much information about yourself, well, too much? 

My blog has an About Me page that lists 10 things you may or may not know about me – or let’s face it – you may not even care to know about me! There are ten millions more things I could have listed on there, but didn’t. Things such as, I read every Agatha Christie book published before I was 12; I didn’t go on a date until I was 21 and didn’t know at the time he was married. Married! (The jerk!) I didn’t go to prom in high school because I was so fat and so unpopular, no one asked me. I started going gray at 16 because of a genetic link that causes premature graying. While this stuff may be interesting to the people who love me, is it really interesting to the general book buying public?

There are things about us which we all have that we really don’t want people to know about  because they’re a little too revealing. And let’s face it: a little too close to deflating that precious ego we all have.

I’ve read twitterfeeds that detail everything the tweeter is doing, from going to work, to arriving, to getting a coffee, to the stomach cramps they have from not eating. And my question is always “Who the heck cares?” Who cares if I’m stuck in traffic? Who cares if I have a dentist appointment? Really, is this information ANYONE- except maybe a stalker – would want to know?

I tend to keep a lot of information close to the vest. That’s just me. I don’t need to know everything about a person when I meet them. I enjoy finding about them as the relationship progresses. And truly, isn’t there something written somewhere about how being mysterious is intriguing and beguiling? I certainly think that’s true.

So the question of when is too much personal info too much is just that: personal. We each decide how much or how little of ourselves we want “out there.”

For me, I prefer to divulge a little at a time, and give away nothing I would be embarrassed to get parroted back to me. Well, that one thing about dating the married man may have been too much to tell. But really, he was a jerk and we only went on two dates. That was one way too many in hindsight.

 

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July 28, 2014 · 11:16 am

Post RWA 2014 Update

So, I had really lousy internet in the hotel sand I didn’t get to blog for over three days.

Three days!

To say that I learned a great deal at the RWA 2014 conference would be a gross understatement. I literally learned something new in every class I took, from craft, to marketing, to publicity.

The speakers were amazing and all highly entertaining – they are romance writers after all. From Jayne Ann Krentz and Susan Elizabeth Phillips I learned things they wished they had known when just starting out and things they were glad they didn’t know. From Nora Roberts ( sigh!) I learned to write the book I want and not the book that I think will sell, or the one that an agent or an editor wants. No. Write the book I want . ( And I will!)

The fabulous Holly Jacobs taught me how to be a fan favorite just by being herself – warm, witty and funny. The girl could make a stoic laugh, I swear.

From the other attendees I learned quite a bit as well. For one thing, we are all in this boat together and as such we should all be helpful, respectful, and open to one another. The first night I was in the lobby, waiting to meet up with some of my NH chapter-mates, Shirley Jump approached me to ask if I was having a good time and were people being helpful to me. Shirley Jump! She is a current board member and a PAN liason and saw that my name badge indicated I was a first time attendee. She went out of her way to make sure I was doing okay and being taken care of. Amazing.

The courses I took were varied in scope and concept. Everything from how to instill conflict in a romantic situation, to how to write hot sex. That was the actual name of the course: How to write hot sex.

I can truly say that this was the best spent money I have ever spent on a conference. It wasn’t cheap –not by a long shot- but it was worth the expense and time.

To be in the presence of such a wide array of published and commercially successful authors in a genre that has not been accepted by the mainstream publishing community to the level it should, was uplifting spiritually, and as an artist.

I can safely say that I came away from this conference with much more than when I went in and that as a writer, I have grown.

I can’t wait until RWA 2015. It’s in NYC!!

 

 

 

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July 24, 2014 · 10:27 am

Dreams do come true…

Yesterday, I had a dream come true. It was a small one, comparative to others, and might even be categorized as a bucket list item. I met NORA ROBERTS.

I know.

I not only met her, I spoke with her. And she was lovely. Absolutely lovely. I was shaking and sweating and as nervous as could be, but she was, just, lovely.

Meeting her alone was worth the cost of this trip to RWA 2014.

I also had the pleasure of meeting Jill Shalvis, Catherine Coulter, and the amazing Holly Jacobs.

But that wasn’t the only reason for the trip. Today the fun work starts. Beginning at 8:30 and and going straight up until tonight, I’ve got workshops planned on the crafting, marketing, and selling of Romance books. I am tired already, but I think it is just because I am coming down  my from exhilarating meeting. One of those workshops is with…wait for it… Nora.

Can this trip get any better?

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July 12, 2014 · 10:28 am

Conference Countdown

In a little under two weeks I will be off to San Antonio, Texas for the yearly RWA conference. It’s my first RWA event and I am literally shaking in my Manolo’s! Can’t wait.

The conference has its own Scheduling app this year and WOWZA did that make it easier for me to figure out what events to attend. The two  events I’m looking forward to the most? A CHAT with Nora Roberts ( OMG!!!) and a session with Jayne Ann Krentz and Susan Elizabeth Phillips. This entire week is a dream come true for a neophyte writer like me. Just to be in the same area breathing the same air as the hundreds of amazing writers at this conference was worth the price of admission and everything else added to it.

I know I am gushing like a little kid on Christmas morning, but this is truly one of those bucket list items for me. Ever since I made the life changing decision to devote more of my time and efforts into writing and hopefully getting published, I have been waiting for an event like this come around. I’ve attended numerous conference over my lifespan – usually medical ones – but this is the first of it’s kind for me – an RWA sponsored event so big, they need a week to get it all done. Amazing.

Several of my “new writing friends” in my local RWA chapter are also attending the conference and by some wonderful coincidence, we are on the same flights into and out of San Antonio. This makes the conference even more wonderful for me because I will see familiar smiling faces wherever I go. Like I said: WOWZA!

I’ll be blogging from the event, detailing ALL the amazing and informative things that I learn and I’ll let you know who of my fan-girl crushes I happen to meet. And my phone will be set to camera-mode the entire time!!

Like I said (AGAIN!) WOWZA!!

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