No, I’m not talking about serving you dinner or drinks. I mean I’m not good at waiting for things to happen, people to get back to me, emails to be answered.
I guess I could have titled this piece I’m Impatient
and it would have meant the same thing.
I’ve always been impatient, even as a child. I was that kid in the cartoon tootsie roll commercial with the Owl – remember? Only I was the owl. “How many licks does it take to get the middle of a tootsie pop? one..two..three.crunch.” That was me. There was no way I was waiting to lick the pop down before tasting the chocolatey tootsie center.
I’m that adult that hits the elevator button 30 times just in case it forgets to stop at my floor.
The minute I sit down in a restaurant I expect the serve staff to be jonny-on-the-spot with a drink order and menu in hand. Those 9 months of pregnancy? Yeah, not happening again. I could only handle the long wait once, hence the only child. Good thing I’m not an elephant.
I’m that person in the 10 items only checkout line who has 9 items and will chastise the person in front of her who has 12.
I hate waiting for people to get to the point – ergo my rude habit of finishing other people’s sentences. It’s a good thing I didn’t go into politics. Or Public Relations. I’d be a nightmare to work with. Who am I kidding?? I’d be fired from any job that required me to be subtle and play the waiting game.
I haven’t called someone on a phone in years. Know why? When you call someone, 9 times out of 10 you need to leave them a message because they’re too busy to pick up. Know what I do instead? Text. Why, you ask? Because people respond to texts IMMEDIATELY!!! I never, ever wait for a text response because I don’t have to. They are always, always answered as soon as they are received.
Love that. LOVE THAT!
I know: obnoxious, right? To the max. That’s me.
As a writer, I have to wait all the time. I wait for query responses from editors and agents; I wait for contracts, first and last edits; galleys; advance checks. I wait anxiously for release dates and the second I know them I start publicizing them. Pre-orders are my life’s-blood. Writing is a waiting game and the road to publication is psychologically tortuous for someone like me who has zero patience tolerance.
I must remember to ask my mother one of these days about my toilet training. Seems that might be where all this started…..hmmmmm.
So, are you a good waiter or a bad one like me? Let’s discuss…….