Category Archives: Family Saga

I had a little epiphany the other day when I was banging away at my NaNoWriMo word count goal. I was in a particularly lighthearted scene and the descriptions the first person character narrator were giving had me laughing out loud in my attic. Truly, this was some fine comedic, descriptive writing. The epiphany came when I asked myself, “Am I the only one who might think this is funny?”

I admit freely my humor is a little skewered and all over the board at times. I laugh at the slapstick of Benny Hill, the snarkiness of Jerry Seinfeld, the crude bathroom jokes of the Red Neck Comics. I can laugh at my own witticisms as well, but I never know if what I am writing is as funny to the reader as it is to me. After all, we all think our children are the brightest, most intelligent and most beautiful kids in the world ( mine is, actually) so I think it’s the same with our words and humor.

I can’t really get a gauge for the funny to others, so I’m going to put a few lines I’ve written here and hope if you read it, you will let me know if it is funny, falls flat, or makes you have to pee with glee.

Here goes:

#1 “Don’t worry, Frankie,” my Aunt Ursula said. “Joey’s a bull. He’ll make it.”“Yeah,” Aunt Gracie chimed in. “Remember when Uncle Vito had his coronary at the racetrack? Doc’s had to shock him four times, but he pulled through. Joey will, too. Our family’s made of strong stock.”

I kept my mouth shut because Uncle Vito was currently confined to a nursing home, an after effect of his massive coronary. He was pretty much brain fried, drooled constantly and had an annoying habit of playing flash the sausage with any female who entered his room, family members included.

#2 When my brother Gianni pointed out she was carrying Daddy’s baby, Mama went ballistic. It took the aunts, Gia and me to finally calm her down. Still fuming, we managed to get her upstairs, into her cotton nightgown and then with a large shot glass filled with Sambucca, into bed and settled. Aunt Gracie was going to spend the night and watch over her to make sure she didn’t go crazy and drive to Delphina’s condo and do something.

And by do something, I mean gut her like a fish.

# 3 My Uncle Sonny knew a guy, who knew a guy, who ran a talent agency, though. Unfortunately, all the out of work actors employed at Skippy Goldstein’s Star Emporium were booked for live appearances. Cupids poised to deliver candy grams; Little Devils set to bring naughty lingerie gifts and boxes of confections to wives, girlfriends and mistresses. Skippy told Uncle Sonny he should have booked way in advance to which, the family story goes, Uncle Sonny lifted Skippy out of his chair by his ugly skinny necktie and told him he’d better come up with a genie—and fast—or his relatives were going to have to dig through the Meadowlands marshes to recover his body.

Uncle Sonny’s an intense guy.

So….Laughing? Cringing? Peeing? What?…….Let’s discuss…..