I’m a #Badass…who knew?

A few weeks ago I started reading this book: You are a Badass ( How to Stop Doubting your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life). I’ll admit this freely: the reason I bought the book when I saw it in Target is because I liked the cover. Something about the color and the graphics screamed  “Buy me!” at me.

Anyway…

The book is good. Really good. There are so many personal takeaways from each chapter that I could–literally–write a book about them! One of them I want to focus on today that spoke recently to me is the reason for this blog post.

Chapter 6 is titled Love the One You Is, and it centers around loving who and what you are and not comparing yourself to others. As a writer, I struggle with this concept daily. I am always obsessing that I am less than every single other writer. Less of a writer than Nora Roberts. Or Jill Shalvis. Or Sandra Brown. I will never write as well as, or as poignantly, or as humorously, as they do. I just won’t. One of Sincero’s tenants in Chapter 6 is, “Comparison is the fastest way to take all the fun out of life.”

Stop the presses! Forget about spoke to me, that line screamed from a mountaintop and echoed all the way to the moon and back.

I’ve always encouraged other writers to write the book of their heart. To write the best book, tell the story they want to tell,  their way and not be worried about what editors or beta readers will think. Be true to yourself as a writer and someone will want to read your work because it will resonate with them. Why, then, have I never believed my own advice? Why, then, have I gotten bogged down in the notion that what I write is never as good as what other writers write? Why, then, have I allowed my insecurities to mount, all the while pushing others to do their best work?

After reading this chapter in Badass and this quote in particular, it was like the heavens opened up after a torrential downpour and I finally saw the sun in all its glory.

A little cliche, yes, I’ll admit that. But it’s the truth. From the moment I read those words and allowed them to sink in deep to my soul, I stopped comparing myself to other writers. I am the best writer I can be at this moment in time. Me. I may not be as funny as Jill Shalvis, or be able to weave an intricate plot like Sandra Brown. And I certainly don’t have Nora Roberts’ unending supply of plots and characters. But I am the best me, the writer,  I can be right now.

And you know what? It’s a freeing notion. By not comparing my work to those I admire best, I have freed myself – some would say my muse – to write the way I want, what I want, and not worry about whether or not it will be liked. I like it! That’s what really matters. All the rest is cupcake frosting. And delicious though that may be ( I mean, come on! It’s frosting!!!) it’s not the reason I write. I write, first, last and always, for me.

yeah…I’m a Badass!

When I’m not being a Badass, you can find me here, still trying to be a Badass! Tweet Me//Read Me// Visit Me//Picture Me//Pin Me//Friend Me//Google+Me// Triber// Book Me

 

 

2 Comments

Filed under Author, Contemporary Romance, Strong Women

If it’s Tuesday…it’s #MomentsFromMenopause

 

I pulled an oldie but a goodie out of the Blogger vault today for my Menopause blog. Hope you agree.

Laugh and the world laughs with you

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

It all begins with #MorningMotivation

SO, about 6 weeks ago I started using my Instagram account to post daily pictures and quotes about 3 concepts I strive for on a daily basis: self-motivation, believing in myself, and personal growth. Since I started that, my account has doubled in people who follow me. I didn’t start doing this, though, to garner new followers–although that’s a wonderful side benefit–but to keep me focused on those three concepts. Posting my daily motivational quote is the first thing I do in the morning, social media-wise, and it sets the tone for my day.

First, I find motivational quote. Pinterest is great for this.

I swear Pinterest was invented by a writer! Self-motivation has never been one of my strong points. Since I’ve been such a people pleaser throughout my life, I’ve tended to put myself second, or even third, when it came to encouraging myself and pushing myself toward a goal. I’m a great cheerleader – ask any of my friends – and I will push anyone towards the finish line of their choice. Myself? Not so much. Recognizing that, I started the daily motivations to help me focus on myself and what I want, for once. Some may see this as selfish, perhaps, but it really isn’t.

What did we ever do before the thought to use a hashtag for promotional reasons became a thing? After the motivational quote is uploaded to my account, I then promote it in an attempt to help others. The hashtag #PersonalGrowth is a great one for this.

I truly try to grow every single day: as a writer, as a wife and mother, as a human being trying to navigate through the quagmire our society has become. Uplifting my thoughts is a good way for me to start my day and do this.

You can’t expect to accomplish anything if you don’t accept and aspire to my third daily tenant, #BelieveInYourSelf.

No one is going to magically make you a success in life. You have to work for it and you have to believe that you can succeed. And you really need to believe it. Just saying the words mean nothing. Deep down in your very soul, you must feel as if you can do anything you set your mind to. Anything. Believing you can do something is the most important tool you have for achieving personal success.

Having a positive outlook in and on life can go a great way in making your days better. There’s a mindset that believes what you speak out into the universe is what you’ll get sent back to you. Negative thoughts, morose mindsets, and critical thinking, if put out there, will become a major factor in what is given back to you from other people and the world in general. Having a positive outlook, not believing everything you do is going to wind up bad or not to your liking, goes a great way in making your days happy and productive ones.

Everyone knows my favorite book of all time is The Little Engine who Could. I truly believe this is the best book about self-motivation and self-actualization ever written, and it’s a children’s book! But, adults can get the takeaway message — he thought he could, so he did — as a mantra for their lives. That little engine let nothing stand in his way to prevent him from getting up and over that hill. Again, this book was written for children to help them accept, see, and know that they can do anything they set their minds to. Why, as adults, do we forget that?

SO, that’s how I start my day. Every morning of every day. Thinking positively, believing in myself, and recognizing I must grow to survive. It all beings with #MorningMotivation

Other places you can find me being positive are: Tweet Me//Read Me// Visit Me//Picture Me//Pin Me//Friend Me//Google+Me// Triber// Book Me

 

12 Comments

Filed under Author, Contemporary Romance, Life challenges

We’re going waaaaaaaay back, here!

Welcome to week #2 of the 2018 MFRWauthor Blog Challenge. Today, we’re supposed to tell you about our earliest memory.

Okay, this one’s a toughie because I’m… not young, and my memory isn’t what it was even a month ago!!!

When I really think about it the very first memory I can conjure is from when I’m about 5 and I went to the library with my babysitter for the first time. I remember walking into the building and being surrounded by the stacks and racks of books. There’s a certain smell libraries have – knowledge and fine paper – that I can still recognize today. It’s like comfort food for my senses. I loved books even back then and I distinctly remember getting my library card when I was with my babysitter. So cool. We took out a bunch of kid books and she read them all to me and then encouraged me to try and read them too. Love that! What a great memory that is.

I still love libraries and whenever I’m in a new city I make a point to visit one. I don’t take any books out, I just troll around the stacks and admire the architecture. And, of course, the books!
Let’s see what some of the other authors in the blog hop have for their first memories:

4.

6 Comments

Filed under #Mfrwauthors

Goals, Actions, and Plans….Oh my!

So the New Year is 10 days old and I’m already hearing people have broken their NY resolutions. I’ve even seen it with my own eyes at the gym. Last week I had to wait for a few machines because all those people who vowed to lose weight and get in shape for 2018 were all gung-ho about hitting the gym every day and sweating the fat off. Fast forward to week 2 and most of those people are back to sleeping in and saying, “I’ll exercise later/tomorrow/never again.”

This is the reason I don’t make resolutions. It’s too easy to break ignore them.

Instead, as I’ve said before, I make a list of goals every year that I want to accomplish during that year and then make an action plan for those goals. Just saying, “I’m gonna hit the gym more this year,” doesn’t put any action behind the process. How often? When? What body areas are you going to center on? Those questions need to be asked and answered with a PLAN.

Remember the A-Team  (the television show, not the horrible and lousy movie remake) and the line George Peppard always said when they finished a case? “I love when a plan comes together.”

Yeah. And, duh! What’s the significant word in that line? PLAN PLAN PLAN PLAN PLAN.

In order to have an effective plan, you need to define the actions to bring that plan to fruition. Once you do, you’ve formed your GOAL.

Seems common-sense-y, doesn’t it?

So, one of my goals this year was to get my life more organized. You might think since I have the luxury of being a full-time writer that there wouldn’t necessarily be a need to get organized. I mean, don’t I just write every day?

Yeah, but….

This year I wanted to set a goal for the number of books I’m going to write and for the number of blogs I want to do each week, so I bought a planner with one section devoted to PROJECTS. Here’s how my process goes:

  • 5 days a week write a minimum of 2500 words daily in your current WIP. No less.
  • On Sundays, writer your 2-3 blog posts for the week.
  • Schedule your Social Media posts days ahead of time using Hootsuite. Book those posts on Sundays.
  • Shut off the phone alerts and all SM alerts while performing #1

Now, if I write 2500 words minimum 5 days per week I’ll have 12,500 words written a week. My books usually range 75000-90000 words, and using this formula I can write a book in 7.2 weeks ( 90,000 words) That’s less than 2 months!!! Yowza. And I’m a good record keeper. This is the daily word count for a Christmas book I just sent to my editor for review:

REGINA daily word count

November 27, 2017                           0                      1064                           1064

November 28, 2017                         1064               1379                           2443

November 29, 2017                         2443               441                           2884

December 4, 2017                            2884               2517                           5401

December 5, 2017                            5401               1622                           7023

December 6, 2017                            7023               2468                           9491

December 7, 2017                            9491               2174                         11665

December 10, 2017                         11665              4307                          15972

December 11, 2017                         15972                2876                          18848

December 12, 2017                         18848                  597                          19445

December 13, 2017                         19445                 2301                          21746

December 14, 2017                         21746                 1438                          23184

December 18, 2017                         23184                  2448                          25632

December 19, 2017                         25632                   2000                          27632

December 20, 2017                         27632                   3138                          30770

December 21, 2017                         30770                    1961                          32731

January 1, 2018                               32731                        5482                          38213

January 2, 2018                               38213                        2578                          40791

January 3, 2018                               40791                        1275                          42066

January 4, 2018                               42066                        3222                          45288

January 5, 2018                               45288                        3812                          49100

January 6, 2018                               49100                        3106                          52206

January 7, 2018                               52206                        696                           52890

Finished!    1.7.18             23 days and a total of 52,890 words.   For me, this isn’t bad!

So, plan+action=goal.

Easy peasy.

When I’m not putting action behind my plans you can find me here, but only after I’ve written my daily 2500 word minimum!

Tweet Me//Read Me// Visit Me//Picture Me//Pin Me//Friend Me//Google+Me// Triber// Book Me

 

 

4 Comments

Filed under Author, Contemporary Romance

#Menopause Tuesday

If it’s Tuesday, then I’m taking about Menopause. Click here to read today’s post: Crepey Skin or Creepy skin.

And if you’re looking for me, I can usually be found here:Tweet Me//Read Me// Visit Me//Picture Me//Pin Me//Friend Me//Google+Me// Triber// Book Me

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

An oldie but a goodie…

Author and Wild Rose Press sistah, Brenda Whiteside had been reposting some of her favorite blogs from the past. I was lucky enough to be included in that list and here’s what she shared today:

I Can’t Dance.

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

My favorite thing I’ve written…

Welcome to 2018 and the newest 52 week Blog Challenge. This year I’m getting on board from day 1 and the first prompt is a goodie.

Parents of multiple children will tell you that they love each of their children equally. I only have one child so I can say for me, that’s true. I love my daughter over all other children. But I tend to think that parents with more than onlies are giving themselves a line. I may be wrong, but I’ve seen it in families I know. One child is usually more favored by a parent whether they mean to show it to the world or not, than the others. **For you parents of multiple children, please don’t yell at me or send me angry tweets. This is simply my opinion, and I’ll explain why next.

This week’s prompt is the Favorite thing I’ve written and why. Now, authors are like parents. Each of their books are considered to be their babies and are treated as such. Most authors will tell you if you ask them which is their favorite book they’ve written, that they love them all equally ( just like parents of multiples will.) Each new book is like a new child, to be loved and cherished and adored.

I get that, I really do.

But….( you knew that was coming, didn’t you!)

After 10 books published ( and a total of 41 written) I do have one favorite that stands above all the others. The reason is simple: it was the first book where I had the HERO fully flushed out in my mind before I ever had a heroine for him.

FIRST IMPRESSIONS is the love story of Padric Cleary and Clarissa Rogers. Pat’s a veterinarian and Clarissa is a family doctor. Before I ever had a thought about Clarissa, Pat was a fully formed person in my head. He’s my favorite male character because he’s so misunderstood by everyone, including his twin sister, Moira. Everyone in Carvan thinks Pat’s a playa. It’s true that he does date a lot of girls, but its because he’s looking for the one.  He wants the same kind of love his parents have – everlasting, complete, and romantic. Every girl he dates thinks they can change his love ’em and leave ’em personality. But Clarissa Rogers isn’t interested in Pat and – of course- that makes her the perfect girl for him.

This was the third book in the MacQuire Women Series that Wild Rose Press published for me and I love it the best of all my books so far simply because I adore Pat Cleary!

Here’s the official blurb: Family Practice Doctor Clarissa Rogers’ first impression of Padric Cleary is biased and based on gossip. The handsome, charming veterinarian is considered a serial dater and commitment-phobic by his family and most of the town. Relationship shy, Clarissa refuses to lose her heart to a man who can’t pledge himself to her forever.

Pat Cleary, despite his reputation, is actually looking for “The One.” When he does give his heart away, he wants it to be for life. With his parent’s marriage as his guidebook, he wants a woman who will be his equal and soul mate in every way. 

Can Pat convince everyone – including Clarissa – she’s the only woman for him?

Now, since this is the first blog of the year in the MFRW blog challenge, stop by some of these other authors and see what they consider the favorite thing they’ve written is.

and if you’re looking for me, I can be found here :

9 Comments

Filed under #Mfrwauthors, Author, Contemporary Romance

#2018 word of the year….

In 2016, my word for the year was YES. Instead of the usual knee-jerk NO I gave to everything, I decided to say yes to everything. It was a good year. In 2017 my word was COMPROMISE. Since I have a my way or the highway personality, I thought this word and the thought behind it would help me in my interpersonal relationships. And it did. Big time.

For 2018 I needed a word that would propel me into writing more and, thereby, produce more so I could get published more. Since I’m the type of person who gets easily distracted – the main reason I don’t listen to music when I write – I needed something that would help me remember to stay the course and not let little things pull me away from writing. Little things like the desire to watch The View, or read a book, or watch a Housewives episode.

That word is FOCUS.

My steps toward being more focused on my writing aren’t many, and that’s a good thing because there are less to remember and get frustrated by.

  1. Utilize a Daily Planner.   You would think because I am such a plotter for my writing I would already do this. You would be wrong. This year I purchased a three-ring binder that holds 3 separate notebooks. One is my TO DO list for each day. One is MY FITNESS list so I remember to track what I eat, drink, and to remind myself to exercise. The third is a PROJECT MANAGER that lists all the works in progress I’ve got going on and their end dates, and ideas for new books.
  2. Set break time. If you work at a job in an office, or a school, or anywhere, you have built-in breaktimes. I’ve never done that. I simply sit at my laptop and write until I get bored ( or distracted) and then do things that waste time.
  3. Turning the alarms on my cell phone off.   Every time my phone dings with a new email or Fb post or Twitter notification, I stop what I’m doing and grab my phone. This pulls me out of creativity mode and at this stage in my life it’s wicked hard to get those lost writing thoughts back! Alarms are shut off whenever I’m writing now.
  4. Clean up the workspace and keep it tidy. Another no-brainer, but I have a tendency to not put things back where they belong in my office, so my desk is littered with reference books, sticky notes, pens and loads of other accouterment that can be very distracting. Keeping my desk tidy is a good way to avoid having my eyes drift to all the mess and then get distracted with putting it all away. 

So, four little steps that I think ( Hope. WISH!!) will help me be more productive in 2018.

While I’m focusing on what I need to do, you can be distracted by finding me here: Tweet Me//Read Me// Visit Me//Picture Me//Pin Me//Friend Me//Google+Me// Triber// Book Me

1 Comment

Filed under Author, Contemporary Romance, Life challenges

What to grab???

As part of the FLAMING CRIMES BLOGFEST, I’ve been asked to answer a specific question from author Chrys Fey. Stick around, beacuse after I answer it there’s a little gift from the Chrys waiting for you!

What is something ridiculous you would save if there was a fire?

 This is a question I’ve never even considered before, but it prompted a memory of when I was working as a nurse in Wisconsin. One of my nursing staff had their house burn down on Christmas day due to a faulty tree wire sparking and setting the place ablaze. The entire family got out with their lives intact but everything they owned was destroyed. They never even had a chance to grab anything but each other.

I’m going with the thought that I’ll have a split second to make a decision if this ever happens to me.

Now, I could say I’d take my laptop because that has all my vital info and my work on it, but I’ve got that all backed up, so if it were destroyed, I’d be okay.

I toyed with the idea of my cell phone for the same reasons, and the same excuses pulled me away from that.

I’m gonna assume my hubby and family get out okay. Scrap books? No. Favorite signed book by favorite author? Nope. My communion dress? No. My daughter’s childhood stuff animal. Nope.

It dawned on me that I do have one thing that isn’t replaceable and only means something to me and that’s my framed picture of Nora Roberts and me.

This is the only copy I have and it was taken at my very first RWA conference in 2014 in San Antonio, Tx. This picture is irreplaceable and worth its weight in gold to me, so I’m not leaving it if the house is burning down!

 

 

BUY LINKS:

Amazon / Barnes & Noble

The Wild Rose Press

 

BLURB: Beth and Donovan are now happily married, and what Beth wants more than anything is a baby. Her dream of starting a family is put on hold as fires burn dangerously close and Donovan becomes a victim of sabotage.

Donovan escapes what could’ve been a deadly wreck. Their past enemies have been eliminated, so who is cutting brake lines and leaving bloody messages? He vows to find out, for the sake of the woman he loves and the life they’re trying to build.

Amidst a criminal mind game, a fire ignites next to their home. They battle the flames and fight to keep their house safe from the blaze pressing in on all sides, but neither of them expects to confront a psychotic adversary in the middle of the inferno.

Their lives may just go up in flames…

About the Author:

Chrys Fey is the author of the Disaster Crimes Series, a unique concept blending romance, crimes, and disasters. She’s partnered with the Insecure Writer’s Support Group and runs their Goodreads book club. She’s also an editor for Dancing Lemur Press.

 

Author Links:

Website / Blog / Goodreads

Facebook / Twitter / Amazon

 

6 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized